thebootydiaries:

Me: *sees my stuffed animal on the floor next to my bed*

Me: Why wasn’t I a better parent

(Source: coveryoursoup)

albearrawr:

mens-rights-activia:

mens-rights-activia:

Me: I’m having such a hard time, can y’all please go easy on me?

According to this meme I made in 2016, 2018 is the last year in a barrage of terrible years. In 2019, the suffering will end and good things will come to us once again

Reblog for a good 2019, because goddamnit we all need it.

driflloon:

every once in a while my brain cells kiss and i experience critical thought

cockyhorror:

httpdemonics:

cockyhorror:

paper-mario-wiki:

u ever think about how ur skeleton is always wet

I wish I never had but thanks for ruining my life

don ’ t worry ! there will come a time when it ’ s not :)

Thanks! Even worse :)

barbaras-caucasity:

sounddesignerjeans:

we have a real motherfucker here, a true idiot child, someone please come collect your bastard

Walmart trying to contact my mom over the loudspeaker

frawgs:

me trying to take control and go to sleep

roesarie:

(Source: pescanuda)

adult-sasuke:

that post was right i wouldn’t have a sense of humor without spongebob. its still some of the goddamn funniest shit i’ve ever seen. spongebob almost dying because he’s too polite to ask for a glass of water at sandy’s house. mr. krabs and spongebob killing the health inspector. smittywerbenjagermenjensen. “I was born with glass bones and paper skin. every morning I break my legs. and every afternoon I break my arms.” the perfume department on the flying dutchman’s boat. that time spongebob cleared his mind to be a fine dining waiter and forgot his own name because that’s how customer service just BE. the ugly barnacle that was so ugly everyone DIED. the END. the one where squidward buys a pie but it’s actually a bomb. and the MUSICAL numbers like??? the fun song. the christmas song. tony award winning song “this grill is not a grill”. the entire band geeks episode like…this is all from the top of my head!!!!! just from the top of my head!!! there’s so much more!!! thank god for stephen and all the laughs i’ve had because of him.